{"id":45,"date":"2015-08-09T21:56:03","date_gmt":"2015-08-09T21:56:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/?p=45"},"modified":"2015-08-10T09:08:45","modified_gmt":"2015-08-10T09:08:45","slug":"pointless-arachnid","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/?p=45","title":{"rendered":"Pointless Arachnid"},"content":{"rendered":"

Got bit by a tick, that’s a tick not a lice
\nIn fact there were three; I was bit by them thrice
\nSo I went to see nurse just to keep her abreast
\nAnd I whipped off my shirt and I showed her my chest
\nAnd yelled, “Nurse will I die?” She said, “Yes given time.
\nBut not here and now, and not of the Lyme.”<\/p>\n

I’d give her a pay rise were it mine to give
\nShe saved my life – for yet do I live.
\nOh pointless arachnid with my blood inside yer
\nI bet you now wish you had been born a spider
\nFor I flushed you away as I’ve done by the dozen
\nA fate I would never impose on your cousin.<\/p>\n

________________________________________<\/p>\n

Find more comic verse in cards, booklets and CD format at<\/strong> www.printregister.com<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Got bit by a tick, that’s a tick not a lice In fact there were three; I was bit by them thrice So I went to see nurse just to keep her abreast And I whipped off my shirt and I showed her my chest And yelled, “Nurse will I die?” She said, “Yes given … Continue reading Pointless Arachnid<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-45","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6zOwV-J","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=45"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":59,"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45\/revisions\/59"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=45"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=45"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mulbert.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=45"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}